Life in London from the perspective of an Eastern European (part 2)
Hi! Welcome back to this massive disappointment called a Medium blog. If you still haven’t done so, check the first part to have at least the slightest idea of what I’m talking about.
Now that you have a 20 square meter flat or, as Londoners call it, a Spacious Massive 2 Bedroom Mansion to live in and you have already found your local Sainsbury’s on Google Maps, it’s time to get moving.
National Insurance
But before you start moving, you should call the JobCenterPlus. No, it does not have jobs for you. Yes, I know it’s misleading. The reason you are calling there is to get your National Insurance Number (NINo). This means once you receive your unique number you will be able to apply for a bank account, become registered at the GP’s (General Practice doctor) and have an identity here in the UK. The process goes as follows:
1. Dial the number on the gov.uk website.
2. Wait for 2 millennia for someone to pick up.
3. Have an interview arranged tomorrow in your least convenient time or next month. No in-between options. The person on the phone will ask you for some details to confirm your identity, which you will be asked to provide during the interview.
4. Wait.
5. Arrive at interview destination. Wait in line. When called out, pretend you know what you’re doing. Reply to questions. Smile.
6. Wait for more than a month and receive your NI number in the mail.
What to do until then? Avoid any activity which involves even the slightest risk. God forbid you end up in the hospital with a 5-digit bill.
Meanwhile, job applications
If I were to rate the exhaustion from searching for a job on a scale 1 to 10, it would be a solid Daniel Radcliffe in the cab. While back at home I had to periodically scroll through 5–6 job posting websites periodically to see what’s available and be done by noon, browsing for a job in UK you will keep discovering new websites everyday, where agencies post their vague, incomplete and ALL CAPS LOCK job descriptions along the lines of:
-What do you do?
-Business.
-What exactly do you do?
-We make money.
-How?
-By working.
You see where that’s going. The aim of employment agents or headhunters is to gather as many CVs as possible to have a wide selection of potential applicants to send to the employer. Applying directly to the organisation is often impossible or requires you to do hours of research and have a telephone book worth of insider contacts to reach the company’s HR department. Besides, you would be lucky of the agent accidentally mentions it in the advertisement, since normally they keep the name of the company hidden until (if) you are selected to provide further details or to participate in the interview.
Once you’ve uploaded your CV and your universal cover letter for any situation, and have applied to every single position that is even remotely relevant to you, you wait. For days. Weeks. Months before an agent approaches you. And when he (or more likely she) does, it’s probably going to be asking if you are interested in a position which is slightly relevant but is either underpaid by a huge margin or located 200 miles away from you. If you’re willing to move that’s fine but for most family guys that’s not a viable option. So you politely ask them to call again when they have something more relevant (and you never hear back from them again). And repeat the cycle until someone decides you are somewhat worth their time and their company’s budget.
An exception to how hard it is to find a job is if you are a high end professional (surgeon, lawyer, dev, etc.) or plan to work a “student” job or plan a career in dining, hospitality or entertainment. Speaking of…
Entertainment
London has a lot of entertainment options to offer. And I mean A LOT. From pub crawls to educational gatherings, to massive rave parties, to cults sacrificing animal corpses to untraditional gods. You can find whatever floats your boat easily especially with apps such as EventBrite or CitySocializer.
I would suggest sticking to the above, since that is something you are unlikely to find in our Eastern side of Europe. While you do have all the options you would have at home such as bowling alleys, cinemas, billiard/pool clubs, they tend to get pricy especially on the weekends.
Drinking in London isn’t judged as terribly as it is back home. In fact, quite a considerable percentage of Brits go out for a drink nearly every day after work. The thing is, drinking in UK is considered a social activity, since locals tend to gather in pubs for a drink while watching football or just to have a socialising experience. Brits mostly drink beer and despite what the locals think, they are not heavy drinkers. Some individuals might be, but (with no supporting research) the percentage of alcoholics per capita is significantly lower than you would think.
The alcohol thing does not apply to students. If it’s flammable, it’s drinkable.
If you are someone who prefers a more active lifestyle, you have a lot of options as well. Gyms, swimming pools, trampoline halls and various memberships are relatively inexpensive and you are sure to find one in your area. If you are looking for something more niche (e.g. Extreme underwater chess), you are more likely to find it in more posh boroughs.
Closing remarks
My future blogs are going to be predominantly about code since the students in my school are obligated to have a tech blog as part of our course. I will try my best to keep stuff interesting so even the least initiated can still enjoy a read.
